[PDF Download] This is Your Team-Building Year

For the parents just stepping into the world of IEPs, 504s, and acronyms you never asked for

If you’re new to the world of IEPs and 504s… if you’re Googling terms like “developmental pediatrician” or “executive functioning” at 11pm… if you’re hearing acronyms in meetings that sound more like a foreign language than a care plan… this post is for you.

It can feel like you need an advanced degree in seven different fields just to understand what’s going on with your child.

Psychology. Psychiatry. Speech therapy. OT. PT. Special education law. Neuropsychology. Orton Gillingham. And on and on…

It’s overwhelming. It’s exhausting. And it’s scary.

This was my experience even with the privilege of a doctorate in Psychology and a list of professionals on speed dial to ask questions. Compound that for parents who aren’t in this field. 

No wonder we can’t sleep at night.

The Messy Beginning (aka Life Before You Have Your Team)

Right now, you’re at the beginning of something new. And like all beginnings, it’s messy and full of unknowns.

You’re trying to make sense of your child’s needs while also navigating a system that wasn’t built to be easy or intuitive. You’re hearing a thousand different recommendations, and maybe none of it feels clear or actionable. One specialist may suggest one thing while another says something completely different. You may second-guess yourself after every meeting, wondering if you asked the right questions or missed something important.

This in-between stage—the part where you don’t yet have clarity but are flooded with input—is one of the hardest places to be. 

We like to know.

We want to avoid uncertainty. 

We need to feel in control.

And right now we have the opposite.

HERE IS A TRUTH I WANT YOU TO CARRY WITH YOU:

THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, WHEN YOU REALIZE THAT YOU KNOW SO MUCH MORE THAN YOU DID BEFORE.

There will be a day when you’re on the phone with another parent—perhaps someone who’s just starting out—and you’ll find yourself saying, 

“Oh! We worked with a great OT I can recommend.” 

Or, “You probably don’t need a psychiatrist right now. What you need is a psychologist.” 

Or, “Yes, that sounds like executive functioning. Here's what helped us.”

You’ll realize you’ve learned some of the language. You’ve found more providers you trust. You know a little more about what’s worth pursuing and what’s okay to pause. You’ll still have more to learn, because this journey is a process, but you’ll no longer be at square one.

Until then…

Let this be your team-building year. 

The year you ask the questions. 

The year you try to piece things together. 

The year you find your people—the ones who explain things in a way that makes sense, who make you feel seen, who have your child’s back and yours.

And as you build that team, something else will begin to form: 

Confidence. Self-assurance. Clarity. Advocacy. 

Not all at once. And not always consistently. 

But it will grow.

There will still be moments of overwhelm, new information to digest, another big decision to make... but it won’t always feel like this.

SO IF YOU'RE IN THE BEGINNING, PLEASE KNOW: 

YOU ARE NOT BEHIND. YOU ARE NOT FAILING. YOUR CHILD IS NOT BROKEN. 

You are building something. 

You are becoming someone. 

And you are not alone.

You’ve got this. 

And we’ve got you.

Practical Ways to Steady Yourself in the Beginning

If you’re craving something concrete to hold onto right now, here are a few simple practices that many parents find grounding:

• Keep a shared Google Doc with your partner (or trusted ally) to track dates, milestones, quotes from school, diagnoses, and medication notes.

• Choose one trusted professional to help you sort through recommendations so you don’t feel pressured to follow everything at once.

• Build in pauses. Give yourself permission to take breaks from research, paperwork, and meetings. This is a long game, and rest is part of resilience.

(More detailed strategies to come. Make sure you're on our mailing list to get them in your inbox.)

Download: "Our Support Team Tracker" ⤵️

Keep track of your child's teachers, counselors, doctors, therapists, and other team members all in one place. Provided in Google Spreadsheet and PDF form. Select whichever is more comfortable for you!

Use Google Spreadsheet

Download PDF

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A Daily Affirmation

I don’t need to have it all figured out today. I’m building my team. I’m learning, one step at a time. 

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If you liked this post let us know! And share it with other parents who might be in the same boat. We are not alone!

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